Hello Everyone! Welcome back to my quirky corner!
This is a topic I have wanted to share for quite some time now. Honestly, the past two weeks it has been right on the top of my mind. There has been so much going on in my life, and I have realized that my happiness is falling farther and farther down on the list of my priorities. So today I want to share my thoughts on this, and explain why we all need to take a moment to remember how important it is to find our happiness.
“It’s so easy to get caught up with pleasing everyone else in life.”
Now I know someone out there is going to say that they never try to please the people in their life. However, lets all just face the hard truth which is that we all have a tendency to people please. Whether it be a parent, a teacher, your boss, your significant other, etc. there is always someone who you go above and beyond to please.
I personally have the problem of doing this entirely too much. I never want to let anyone down. In a way it sounds like a good thing because I am reliable, and I always do my best to ensure that no one gets let down. However, the truth is that someone does always get let down. The person at the end of the day that never gets taken care of, and almost always is let down is me. I focus so much on pleasing the people around me that I forget to take care of myself.
This more so applies to my work life. I set high standards at work so that my bosses are never disappointed. Both of my bosses are definitely the people I try to please the most. I want to do good at my job, and I want to be considered a reliable employee. Unfortunately, that means that regardless of how much I have to do I will accept more work. No matter how stressed out I am I will allow them to add more stress on me. I will switch my schedule when needed, work other areas, and even take my work home with me. When it comes to work I strive so hard to please my bosses that I forget to hit the off switch on work.
“But sometimes if you put all of your energy outwards, you forget to care about the most important person of all – YOU!”
I find that I take every last piece of energy I have, and I put it into everyone else. I do what everyone else needs done so that their life can be a little simpler. I go above and beyond at work to ensure that my boss is never disappointed. I am not complaining about this at all. I want to always be the person that my friends, family, and coworkers feel like they can go to. My point of all this is not to say that we all need to stop people pleasing. My whole point is that in the process of taking care of everyone else we have to remember to leave enough energy to take care of ourselves.
In order to store up that energy we sometimes have to essentially let people down. The truth is that no matter how hard we try we cannot make everyone happy all of the time. Sometimes we have to admit that we don’t have the extra time to help someone else. Sometimes we have to let people know that we are too stressed to take on more stress. Most importantly we have to learn that it is okay to need a break. It is okay to let people down sometimes. That is one of the hardest lessons for me to learn, but it is an important one. It is important to know your limits, and not force yourself to exceed them too far.
Recently, my work life which basically takes up most of my life has become extremely stressful. I have started to notice that I work 40 hours a week, and then bring my work home on top of that. My life has literally been revolving around work, and what I have found is that my happiness is no longer a priority.
I have been stressed to the max lately. I am overwhelmed at work, and oh my does it show. I come home to think about what I need to fix at work until finally I fall asleep. To then sadly just dream about the stress at work. It is like a never-ending vicious cycle that breaks me down more each day. On top of that I have personal matters that I stress over daily. My life has suddenly become all about stress.
I have gotten so caught up in thinking about everyone else that I have forgotten to think about myself. I am finally waking up to see that there is more to life than my stress. There will always be a lot of things for me to take care of, and there will always be people who I don’t want to let down. However, my happiness has got to become a top priority.
Every evening now I am trying to block out time in my schedule that is “ME” time. During this time I don’t worry about work, I don’t answer calls or texts, I don’t get on social media, and I only think about myself. It doesn’t have to be a long time, starting out I have 1 hour of dedicated Kayle time. I might read a book, watch a show, or take a hot bubble bath with a face mask. It doesn’t matter what you do during that time as long as you are focusing on yourself instead of others.
It isn’t selfish to take time for yourself. It is important. There is nothing wrong with people pleasing. I am in no way saying you should stop caring about others, or that you shouldn’t put your energy into making others happy. My whole point in this rant is telling my readers how important it is to find balance in life. Please all the people you want to, but make sure to block off time for yourself as well. Put your energy out in the world, but reserve enough for yourself.
It has taken me a long time to realize the importance of this message. To be honest I am still not the greatest at it. I am still learning to find balance. But that’s why I wanted to talk about this today. You don’t have to be perfect at it, but you have to try for the sake of your personal health. Whether you start with an hour or less just start somewhere. Take time to focus on yourself without worrying about work or other people. Phone calls, work, friends, and whoever else can wait while you take care of you. Don’t be like me, and let your happiness fall to the bottom of your priorities. It is never okay to sacrifice your happiness so that everyone else can be happy. Remember that your happiness is just as important as everyone else’s.
Thank you all so much for joining me in my quirky little corner, and I hope that you enjoyed this post. I hope that my readers can take away from this that we have to take care of ourselves as well as others. Enjoy your evening!
“What are some things you do to take care of yourself?”